Here is a link to the reading for Monday, Sept. 13. Josh Weil wrote it for the New York Times, where it appeared Aug. 21.
Choose your favorite paragraph. Post a 200-word comment explaining why it is effective and what would happen to its effectiveness if the sentences were rearranged.
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I believe the last paragraph is the most descriptive paragraph and it shows the writers true passion for what he did. The part about the slip n slide was a very dark piece of how he saw his whole life and how he can’t change it. I think this whole paragraph is a dark piece of how he wishes he could go back to the way it used to be but it never will. I also believe that he is thinking of trying to explore and adventure again but most likely it won’t be any more of the amazing adventures. At the very end he says the woods outside looked unexplored so he may just travel the states and keep it simple. If the sentences were rearranged I don’t believe this paragraph would put out the same message. Some sections might say he misses the adventures but I don’t believe it would give off such a clear message as it does now.
ReplyDeleteI like paragraph number four. It sums up perfectly the authors attitude about summer, and his interpretation of life in general. I quoute: "When you come up to breathe, the air is pure exhilaration." His life is about exhileration, and straying away from the normalities of a conventional life, to find his own path, and his own happiness. The authors's brother is similar to him, but eventually settles down to a more convential life, marrying and having a child. The author does not understand his brother's motives for living a 'normal' life, so he continues to seek adventure. At the age of thirty, the author realizes what his brother did many years ago, that many people are meant to eventually settle down and have a family. In conclusion, this paragraph is effective because it macromanages the whole writing. -Kyle D.
ReplyDeleteParagraph twelve is my favorite. By using questions, the author draws me in and shows the way he is thinking which makes his story more relatable. While reading this paragraph, I actually thought about my own personal experiences and uniquely thought about the answers I would give. This paragraph also reveals that he feels his wanderlust gives him his freedom. So, his accident has taken away what he feels is most important in his life. The paragraph is very effective because it grabs the reader’s attention and the last sentence really pulls it all together. The second and third sentences could be rearranged because they are general questions, but the first sentence relates to paragraph eleven because it talks about ‘fields’ so it works well as being the first sentence of paragraph twelve. The last paragraph answers the question, so if it was elsewhere in the paragraph it would lose its effectiveness. I also believe that this paragraph doesn’t have a topic sentence, but does work well because of how it relates to the previous paragraph.
ReplyDeleteI like the last paragraph the best. It shows his true passion and love for summer which makes it my favorite. I think that this is the most effective paragraph because it shows how much he loves summer and how great it was. It’s about him remembering in detail how great it was and still wishing it was the same. The last sentence in the paragraph shows that even though he is older and grown up, he still has the feeling of adventure that he wants to fulfill. The last sentence shows that the woods call to him and intrigue him. I think that if the sentences were rearranged that the paragraph would not be as effective because it starts with his memories and moves to him still thinking and being intrigued by the woods like they were calling to him to come explore like every other summer. -Rachel Hicks
ReplyDeleteMy favorite part of this article was the part towards the end when he is making the realization that there is more to summer than seeking adrenaline rushes. He sees his brother with his wife and little girl, going through the motions of a completely normal day. This was enough for him to realize that he has been overlooking the simple things in life, and inspired him to no longer take them for granted.
ReplyDeleteIf the sentances had been rearranged, the overall effect of the paragraph would not be as effective. It was important to the story line that he made all of these realizations in the end, since in his real experience, he did not figure it out until after his accident. If he had talked about his experience with his brother and his brother's family in the beginning of the article, it would have made no chronological sense.
ReplyDeleteIf you’ve ever been hurled head-first into white water, you know the feeling: your world upturned, your hold on it spun loose, the current pitching you forward so fast you struggle to grasp what has happened to time. When you come up to breathe, the air is pure exhilaration.
ReplyDeleteThis was my favorite paragraph because I have gone whitewater rafting and it’s as exhilarating as he describes it. I find this paragraph effective because the description is right on and the sensory words really give you a sense of getting into those rapids yourself. Also if I try the technique of moving the sentences around it does not really work, they don’t sound right.
I like the paragraph where he starts “We went to the YMCA every week” because he talks about him gaining his strength and being able to see what having a family is like. I think this is a strong paragraph because it contrasts what his life was like when he was always hiking or away for long periods of time and what it would be like to start a family. I believe that contrast is good in an essay because it can pull the reader back into your story by seeing the different parts you want noticed.
ReplyDeleteI also like the last paragraph because it talks about the family again but then it ends with him thinking about a place he hasn’t been before, a place that is “unexplored.” This makes the impact of the story that much stronger because he is able to bring it all back together by reminding us of what he really enjoys doing and wants to continue doing with his life. Even though he could enjoy other aspects of life he’d choose exploring over settling down.